Ah, Cobwebs Again ... But the brooms are out

Posted June 06, 2012 by Crazy Nairobian in Humor Articles
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Hmmm, this blog keeps getting more and more cobwebs. I have been a little busy since I last posted. Actually thats a lie. If I somehow managed to scramble two hours to watch Men In Black III, I cannot have been that busy. Its just plain laziness I guess or PSSM (Post Self Stimulation Malaise) similar to PCM (Post Coital Malaise) or as people call it plainly, after-sex tiredness. But considering I got an email from Mr. Blue Balls telling me that he has boarded a train to come pay me a visit, it cannot be PCM so I am going with PSSM. Thats my story and am sticking to it.

While I was away from the blogosphere, human beings discovered a new delicacy called ... umm ... human beings. My understanding is that a guy called Kinyua decided to pick a guys brain in an occurence that left the victim totally disheartened. So there is a heartless ghost out there people - with half a brain. If that shit isnt enough to scare you, then I can officially say you and Kinyua can become BFFs. The devil on the other hand is therefore not the most heartless person in hell in light of these developments. Someone else ascended to the throne and while the devil may say he does not have the heart for the job, this guy doesn't seem to care because he is, after all, heartless.

Speaking of heartless, some terrorists also attacked us - AGAIN - right in the middle of our Capital City. Common sense tells me that if I hear there is a bomb at point A, I should walk as far away as possible from point A. I however think whoever was dishing out common sense just managed a fart in Kenya because people flocked there like there were magic beans being dished out from the remnants of the bomb. Not to mention our (so called) leaders were there in a dick measuring contest to see who would make the most uninformed and ridiculous statement about the attack. Electricity was blamed, then terrorists, then stones were again getting another round of being theoretically turned. I think stones in this country make jokes about our government because of its common statements that it will leave none of them unturned yet the ground they lay on is still virgin.

Virgin ... matters virgin.

Virgin atlantic decided we were not interested in virgins and, in effect, announced they will be pulling out of the market. That is no shocker considering Nairobi's last virgin was last sighted on her way to Rongai two years ago. She is scheduled to arrive there sometime next week after two years of travel to the far away land to keep her away from the vultures of Nairobi. Virgin Atlantic has thus learnt that Nairobi is not the place where people think good things of you because you are virgin.

Oh, and I now understand this country is 49 years old. I dont know whether our ancestors moved here from Uzbekistan in 1963 because that is the only way this country can be 49 years old.

Anywho ... its back to doing what I love. Writing. See you on the interwebs.



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Crazy Nairobian
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Sanely Insane.


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