The Political Beer Ladder ...
1st Beer - The Musallyia. Cool calm and collected. Your faculties are all working correctly and everything you say sounds very sober. And boring.
2nd Beer - The Rafael Toojoo. You are just there. This beer is as useless. Everyone knows it exists but no one really knows its use, agenda or effect.
3rd Beer - The cool RAO. You make great points and look confident. You start talking with some courage and authority.
4th Beer - The Kalownzo. You have started feeling the alcohol coming into your system but you are not yet tipsy. Or sober. Or aware of whatever you are. You are not even sure you should be in the bar. But its cold outside so you'd rather stay in. You get the point.
5th Beer - The Amos Wakow. The random smiling at non-issues starts. Nothing is funny, but the smiles abound.
6th Beer - The Mutooler. Mini-skirts will be noticed and approached. If your motives are questioned, DENY DENY DENY!
7th Beer - The other RAO - Your volume goes up. Nusu mkeka and the vitendawili start. Suddenly you are the cock of the walk. Everyone loves your stories and cheers you on.
8th Beer - The Keymoonya. Threat mode is activated. I will not resign. I will not pee. I will not pay. I will not carry home a chips funga ... Oh, wait. That last one is never on the list.
9th Beer- The Keybaki. Your speech starts suffering. You start repeating yourself and mistake people laughing at you for people laughing with you.
10th Beer - The Karoocy & Atwolee Combined. Slap mode is activated and the volume hits max. Saliva shower is also activated. Anyone messes with you and you give them a high-five in the face, or a typhoon of saliva sprayed on their faces.
11th Beer - The Esther Mooroogy and Bifwooli combined. You start suffering from speech before thought and foot in mouth disease. You start embarrassing yourself at this point. If you are a lady, you start threatening to strip.
12th Beer - The Uhuruto. You will wreck havoc. Chances of getting arrested increase with the number of beers you take. Soon you get branded an ICC member (Irritating Club Cunt)
13th and Above - The Sonkko. After this, you wont make any sense. You will do things that your friends will be laughing about for a long time. Punching walls will just be you warming up. You will be behaving like an idiot created to scale. One represents ten. The drunk ones will love you. The sober ones will recognize the idiocy you potray.
Over and out
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